(no subject)

This morning is the morning of small things.

1. I realised why my neck (and other parts) ached so much yesterday. Despite the Bureau of Meteorology's predictions we had air pressure changes with the rain. Aches are in abeyance now, though I can feel they'll come back if the weather tries to flip-flop again.

2. I received an email from Elisabeth. She says she sent me photos of her naked and I never responded. In case she is listening I didn't get them and I don't want them. I might want them if they came with the millions of dollars other spammers offer, because then I could give young Elisabeth's photos to my brothers (who presumably would admire them before laughing themselves silly) and then fix my laundry. My laundry needs repainting and all the tiles are falling off and I lack the skill to fix it. So next time you email me, Elisabeth, make sure you enclose some money to cover a handperson who can fix my laundry for me?

3. The last dribble of stuff for Aurealis has all been posted, so hopefully will all come in the mail today. One book has, already. This means my Saturday is all planned.

4. I made a Conflux announcement thingie on my food blog. If any of you are interested in the shape of next year's banquet (including testing recipes for it) you may want to head over there. I was playing with the idea of reducing work by not doing the massive testing this year but serried ranks of puppydog eyes faced me whenever I said this, so I have found lots of recipes and it will be a group effort, like last year.

5. I don't like housework.

6. Rain interferes with reception from my set-top box.

7. If I proscrastinate long enough, then maybe work wil go away.

8. 'Procrastinate' comes from Latin 'pro' - for and 'cras' tomorrow.

9. Why are lists of ten so much to be desired?

10. My tomato plant called up the rain yeterday, I think, purely so I didn't have to water it. It's a very thoughtful tomato plant. It has a flower. It isn't dead yet. I've had it nearly two weeks and it still hasn't karked it. I'm very proud of its endurance.

(no subject)

I'm tidying my flat for tonight. Whenever I find interesting scraps of text I save them for something useful. I had a pile eighteen inches deep on my table, and now it's down to an uneven frazzled heap. One small set of instructions fell out of it and I have decided to share them with you and then put them in the recycling bin.

A food magazine had a free pedometer the other day and the thought of a pedometer that's labelled "Food ideas" appealed to my inner self and so I bought the magazine. I think I might post it to an unsuspecting innocent outside Australia - but I'm keeping that pedometer.

The first half of the instructions say:

"Features:

1. pedometer (Step counter) adopts a microcomputer technoloy with mini-construction dessign and readale LCD display. The paces are detected via movement of waist.

2. Step counts range from 0 to 99999

3. Reset key to clear the records.

4. It will auto turn off after not in use for one and half minutes.

Mounting:

Attach the pedometer securely to your waistband or belt. Close to the center of your boby, falsemountinting or walking way will possibly cause inaccurate result."

The rest is straightforward, except for the description of it as a "precinse instrument." I'm quite surprised that these instructions aren't prefaced "Dear Robyn."

On that matter, everyone else involved in the election knows where they're going on the day. It's only the Australian Electoral Commission that can't advise where polling booths are. Following advice from a leaflet-handing-out friend, I think I'll be voting at Melrose High, which is a fair walk (but I can get a lift there) and then take the bikepath back (because it's pretty) and wear my precinse pedometer (because I can) and be really, really careful not to encourage falsemountinting.