(no subject)

I am up way past my bedtime because of the weather (which is odd) and this means I have finished that book. I shall put the cover somewhere safe and not have to even think about it for a long, long while.

I've also done all my Chanukah presents (except for a little prettification) and a bunch of other useful things. This means I'm allowed to be more cheerful tomorrow.

In fact, I had an hour of cheer today, because Matthew and Donna dropped in with presents. They were giving me back the contents of my freezer, and brought other things round as well. They must have known how morose I was getting! All I need to do is take that hour of cheer and multipy it into many hours tomorrow. I think I can manage that.

PS I keep saying that the advantage of poor health is reading time. I just counted and I've read 10 books this week, three of them over 600 pages. I could be in danger of becoming almost educated, if I don't take due care.

(no subject)

If anyone would like a small e-gift for Chanukah, then just send me your email address by Friday. You don't have to know me personally to receive the gift, but it would probably help if you liked food. I'm asking friends to opt in rather than opt out, because there's just way too much junk email roaming the ether right now.

I promise not to collect your email addresses and use them for evil. In fact, all I'll do is send the document your way and then delete it. Unless you specifically ask me to hang onto it.

If you say "I want spam, now!" I shall respond with "It's not kosher. Try someone else."

For friends dropping in on Saturday, I have a printed version. The design quality is zilch, but it's on rainbow paper.

ETA: Someone just asked if it's necessary to be Jewish. No need to be Jewish. No need to even know what Chanukah is. No need to have met me. Every now and again I put together favourite recipes to cheer folks up a bit. By 'every now and then' I really mean once every thirteen years. Thirteen years ago it coincided with Rosh Hashanah. This year it coincides with Chanukah.

(no subject)

Last night and today have been dominated by long and fascinating phonecalls. I can't talk about the friends who rang, because their side of the conversation is private. I can talk about the two important insights they gave me. I'm fortunate in my friends.

The first insight is how very pivotal this year has been for me. My friends helped me contextualise life events starting with the death of my second father right down to stuff from this week. They've also helped me accept the fact that facing down my nightmares is only the first step to handling life more successfully.

The second insight is that I didn't realise that I look so different to other people from the way I appear to myself. I apparently look all kinds of competent. Also, I do not look shy. By 'not look shy' I mean someone who walks out into the world, trusting and confident. I am so not this person. It's nice that I seem this way, though. I've decided to call it 'protective camouflage.'

And now I'm going to return to my book for today, which is one of Michael Chabon's. I so love his writing. And every book I finish can be put away. This is me doing housework. Other folks wash and polish and scrub. I finish reading, so the piles of books are diminished and chairs apparently appear from nowhere as surfaces that may be sat upon.

If I read enough, maybe my tables will appear from nowhere as surfaces upon which comestibles may appear, next Saturday. Or is that just wishful thinking?