(no subject)

I've lost a busload of commas. I left them in a safe place and now they're gone. I find my comma'd text littered with inappropriate apostrophe's. Would whoever took my commas' please return them and take the inappropriate apostrophes' back.

I promise not to retaliate if you do this within the next twenty-four hour's. If, in twenty-four hours', my pro'se is not restored to its pristine self, then I shall discover the culprit and replace all fullstops and ellipses with those Spanish exclamation marks (the upside down ones).