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Dec. 16th, 2006 09:34 amYour second Chanukah present is a list of the toys you *won't* be getting for any festival in the foreseeable future: http://www.radarmagazine.com/features/2006/12/toys.php
Dec. 16th, 2006
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Dec. 16th, 2006 12:06 pmYour third present is this: http://www.concurringopinions.com:80/archives/2006/12/a_guide_to_grad.html
While you contemplate the science of grading papers, I'll be printing out a story, which will be your fourth present, but which I also need for this afternoon. All I have to do is remember where I put it.
While you contemplate the science of grading papers, I'll be printing out a story, which will be your fourth present, but which I also need for this afternoon. All I have to do is remember where I put it.
Once upon a time there was war in the Middle East. This is a rare and unusual occurrence. As a result, Israel (or Judea, or whatever that stretch of territory was called around 165 BCE) was overrun by very pagan invaders. Permeating the Jewish tradition about the reign of Antiochus in Judea are many exciting tales. They include stories of patience in adversity and of blood and gore. There are stories of alcoholism, preceded by patience in adversity and followed by blood and gore, and of weaving cloaks from those odd bits of wool that get caught on brambles when sheep walk too close.
Of all these stories, the most famous one is how the Maccabees won back the Temple. They won back a lot more than the Temple, but the Temple was the important bit. The Maccabees were a strong Jewish family. They didn’t like the obligatory nature of Antiochus’ intriguing variety of paganism. They could have been role models for Che Guevara, because their preferred type of politics was charismatic and their preferred form of warfare was guerrilla. They had not, however, read Karl Marx. They also didn’t speak Spanish. They practised all those heinous acts forbidden under Antiochus, namely Torah study, keeping Sabbath holy, keeping a kosher kitchen, circumcision, and so on. Other rebellious souls who kept kosher suffered martyrdom for their efforts. But then, they weren’t charismatic guerrilla leaders.
After long and bloody trials and much hiding in the wilderness, the Maccabee family and their followers won back Judea and - most importantly - the Temple.*
Let me remind you that Antiochus had insisted that all Jews worship his own not-at-all-Jewish, deities. This worship was enforced everywhere, including at that holiest of holies, the Temple. It was used for worship that looked decidedly unsavoury to the pure-minded revolutionaries. (Revolutionaries are always pure-minded.) When the Temple was won back, they wept because it was defiled. The solution for the defiled Temple was simple. Firstly came a big spring clean. After that, the Temple had to be re-sanctified.
Re-sanctification was a big problem. Not that re-sanctification in itself was a difficult procedure, but there was a certain lack of holy oil. The Temple had, after all, been defiled, and that went for most of its contents too. In fact, there was only enough holy oil for one day. But one little lamp of oil lasted eight days, and the ancient Judeans declared that “A Great Miracle Happened Here” and threw a party to celebrate. The Hebrew acronym describing the event became the basis of gambling using a spinning top. Jews ever since then have spent 8 days of the year enjoying the miracle. It is pure co-incidence that the annual Jewish gambling and gift-giving stint is between the Melbourne Cup and Christmas. Isn’t it?
*Note: the hiding in the wilderness is where the cloaks came in. Public nakedness is seldom encouraged in Judaism.
Of all these stories, the most famous one is how the Maccabees won back the Temple. They won back a lot more than the Temple, but the Temple was the important bit. The Maccabees were a strong Jewish family. They didn’t like the obligatory nature of Antiochus’ intriguing variety of paganism. They could have been role models for Che Guevara, because their preferred type of politics was charismatic and their preferred form of warfare was guerrilla. They had not, however, read Karl Marx. They also didn’t speak Spanish. They practised all those heinous acts forbidden under Antiochus, namely Torah study, keeping Sabbath holy, keeping a kosher kitchen, circumcision, and so on. Other rebellious souls who kept kosher suffered martyrdom for their efforts. But then, they weren’t charismatic guerrilla leaders.
After long and bloody trials and much hiding in the wilderness, the Maccabee family and their followers won back Judea and - most importantly - the Temple.*
Let me remind you that Antiochus had insisted that all Jews worship his own not-at-all-Jewish, deities. This worship was enforced everywhere, including at that holiest of holies, the Temple. It was used for worship that looked decidedly unsavoury to the pure-minded revolutionaries. (Revolutionaries are always pure-minded.) When the Temple was won back, they wept because it was defiled. The solution for the defiled Temple was simple. Firstly came a big spring clean. After that, the Temple had to be re-sanctified.
Re-sanctification was a big problem. Not that re-sanctification in itself was a difficult procedure, but there was a certain lack of holy oil. The Temple had, after all, been defiled, and that went for most of its contents too. In fact, there was only enough holy oil for one day. But one little lamp of oil lasted eight days, and the ancient Judeans declared that “A Great Miracle Happened Here” and threw a party to celebrate. The Hebrew acronym describing the event became the basis of gambling using a spinning top. Jews ever since then have spent 8 days of the year enjoying the miracle. It is pure co-incidence that the annual Jewish gambling and gift-giving stint is between the Melbourne Cup and Christmas. Isn’t it?
*Note: the hiding in the wilderness is where the cloaks came in. Public nakedness is seldom encouraged in Judaism.